3.3.10

Conversations about the first look

...one late night while (not) studying over boba...

Me: Hey, do you want to do a first look?
Him: Um...I do not know what that is, therefore, probably not.
Me: Ok.
{tapping of fingers on table}
Him: Aren't you going to tell me what it is?
Me: Well you don't want to do it.
Him: {look of annoyance} Ok, what is it?
Me: It's when the couple meets before the ceremony. Often times, one of them taps the other on the back or something similar, and then the other person turns around, and then the photographer is supposed to take pictures as you ooo and ahh at one another. It's like a "ta-dah! Look at how lucky you are to be marrying this gorgeous person!" before the ceremony.
Him: Oh. So, this is something that doesn't cost money?
Me: Correct.
Him: And it sounds like I don't have to do anything except be there, which I already will be doing.
Me: Yup.
Him: Yeah I don't care. As long as it doesn't take effort or cost money, we can do it if you want.

Leave it to the boy to make any decision based on cost, effort, and whether or not there will be free food.

We'll be seeing each other before the ceremony because we are walking down the aisle together. But a first look is still up for debate, I can't decide if it would make me feel totally uncomfortable or just plain happy.

How do you feel about the "first look"?
Moo

22 comments:

Abbie said...

We didn't do a first look because J was Mr. Traditional when it came to that. If you guys are already going to see each other, then it might be fun to do it. Otherwise, how were you planning to meet up before the aisle walk? If you do, it would allow for more personal pics beforehand, too.

Chic 'n Cheap Living said...

Do it! I am biased but really felt like it was such a time saver and enabled us to spend more time with our friends and family. It could be a ton of fun and you'd get some pictures of you guys and the wedding party out of the way.

DFY said...

I really want to but Ryan doesn't. I'm just hoping I can change his mind :] I say do it!

honey my heart said...

i really enjoyed the first look. we had a few intimate moments with each other and we didn't have to worry about not seeing each other before the ceremony.

Gaynor said...

First looks aren't common here so we wont be doing one - first time we will see each other will be when im walking down the aisle.

Maggie said...

We did a first look and loved it - it really relaxed both of us throughout the day to have that moment that was just us (okay, plus a photographer). And since you'll already be meeting up in some capacity to do the aisle walk, why not have a little photo shoot thrown in? You'll love how much more time you have to spend at your reception, too.

Cupcake Wedding said...

I just want to get ad many pictures over with beforehand so I have more time to party with friends after

Megan said...

For me - it was perfection. It completely calmed me down for the day, and it was such a joy to get to hang out with him before we got married! Maybe I'll actually recap my wedding soon and tell people about it...

buhdoop said...

I think it would be nice to spend a little time together before the ceremony. You guys could get a drink (coffee or bubbly) and just talk a little bit before you do the do.

I think we will meet before the ceremony. We have talked about it and we both agree it would be nice.

Naomi said...

I say do it. For us it allowed plenty of extra time for photos before the ceremony. And it helps you loosen up before the walk down the aisle. DO IT!!

A Fortunate Bride said...

We're doing it. Like some PP's, I also want to get as many photos as possible out of the way before the wedding. And since his giant family likes to do about 1,800 pictures on even the most non-eventful days, we're gonna need a lot of time!

I hate to just walk in all fixed up and in my giant dress and have us be like, "Hi!" in front of everybody. So I'm planning to go in one room and have everybody leave and then have him walk in.

Luxeville said...

Once he sees you in that fabulous Kitty Chen dress and the hair and makeup... he'll know what all the money and energy was for. DO IT!!! :)

Chocolate Lover said...

I think both work well, its a matter of personal preference. We are sticking to the traditional way for this one

Mo said...

My, we have an overwhelming consensus to do a first look! Not what I was expecting at all. Thanks for all the great feedback. :)

@Abbie: Good point about what to do when meeting up. I guess I didn't think seeing each other for the first time was going to be anything special.

Or I can practice my pick-up lines. Hey baby, come to this vineyard often?

@Luxeville: You're too sweet. :) I hope that's his reaction! Even though he's actually seen my dress, he still can't pick it out of a line-up.

dayseye said...

I'm assuming then that you're not doing a door ceremony - a Chinese wedding tradition where the groom & groomsmen go pickup the bride at her parent's hosue to go to the ceremony, but must pay off the bridesmaids in order to get into the house; typically, the price is a good number like $888 or $168 -- then?

'Cause that would cost the boy mucho dinaro, but I'm sure your sisters would love the chance to hustle him & his BM. hehehe.

THE ALTERNATIVE WIFE said...

We didn't have a first look because we spent the night before and entire day together getting ready. But my sister and her husband did it and it was amazing! They were both so excited and the photos captured the whole thing. They're still some of my favorite photos from her wedding. I vote for do it!!!! :)

miss.t said...

we did the first look and i highly recommend it! we took so many pictures before the actual wedding, we got to enjoy cocktail hour!!!!!!! :)

Missy May said...

How cute is that?! Very good idea!

Ruthy G. said...

the first conversation we had about this turned into a fight. I really wanted to do it...he wanted to do it, but didn't want it photographed. We compromised...we had it photographed...but we decided not to share those pics with the public. I'm so glad we did it...it was amazingly intimate...even with a photographer snapping away.

an aqua juel said...

I wanted to do one, but the time of day we'd do one...well, 2 o'clock sun in July? Not great for photos so no first look for us. Besides, our photographer said that she'd be able to set aside plenty of time around 8 in the evening as the sun is setting to take them...you know, after dinner has been served and we're ready to sneak away from the party for a little bit. Maybe talk to your photographer and see what he/she says?

PDX Bride said...

I'm so glad that we did it. Then we got to spend more of our day together as we took all the pics before the wedding. The only thing that made it bad was my maid of honors mother hiding around the back of the house so she could watch it . . . so first I saw M and then I saw her and my first look was literally one look before the moment was stolen by her. Oh well . . . I still say it was good.

very married said...

we did a "first look" and it was really nice to be able to kiss and be teary-eyed together alone...

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